Something about starting 2012 didn’t sit well with me in December. The New Year is all about making changes and resolutions and beginnings. But I knew that if I put that pressure on myself, if I made a promise to myself I would let myself down; I would fail. As they say, the past is your best prediction of the future.
I was flipping through channels when I came across Joel Osteen. Just as a quick side note-I can’t stand watching him preach…it makes me queasy. But before I changed the channel he said something that struck me: “We can’t always help having negative thoughts about ourselves, but don’t you dare speak them; don’t you dare bring life to those thoughts. If you do, then they are real. If you do then they are the truth.”
Wow. How often do I say things like…I can’t do it; I’m not smart enough; I’m not fast enough; I’m not social enough? I think these things all the time but I often speak them too. And he’s right. If we think them and then say them then we are giving life to them. They become true. They become the vision of ourselves. If I say I’m not smart enough then I will only act in life as though I am not smart enough.
So what happens if we change what we speak? I will probably always feel at least a little insecure. It will always occur to me that I can’t do something; that I can’t be the best me; that I’m not strong enough. But if I say out loud that I can do it, if I tell other people that I am strong enough, if I speak about my successes instead of my failures then maybe I can start to make my mind believe it to. Maybe my speech will influence my actions and my thoughts won’t be true anymore.
I feel like someone just put the spotlight on me. I feel like someone just peeled my eyes open.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Monday, December 19, 2011
You Are So Blessed
The mall walking lady to me and Charles (with her hand on her heart) after seeing Briana and Hudson holding hands while walking together after their fun Christmas train ride at Metro North: “Oh my gosh, you are so blessed.”
Yes, yes we are. Thank you for reminding me.
Yes, yes we are. Thank you for reminding me.
Friday, December 16, 2011
A Reflection of 2011
I started off writing this post by trying to think of all the big things that happened to me in 2011. But my list seemed less significant than it was last year. In 2010 I had a baby, I bought a home and I changed jobs. Life was good and stressful.
This year I’ve achieved my first full year at my new job, which is good, but I have to say I’m still unsure about my career path. I’m still looking, still listening and still hoping for a spark. Hudson turned one and Briana turned four, which may be not as significant to others but to me it meant that my little boy wasn’t a baby anymore, and my little girl is nearly school age.
Other than that life has been mostly normal. Charles is his same old good daddy and hard working self and I’m the same old content yet unsatisfied with my direction in life kind of girl. So for this I am thankful. I am thankful that things have been mostly smooth and low key. I’m thankful we are both able to support our family. I’m thankful we still have each other and our health. I have a tendency to want to shake things up when they get a little slow, but when things are smooth it just means you’ve achieved what you’ve worked hard for.
The world is big scary place. But if I have my family to come home to, it’s all okay. Here's to another year.
This year I’ve achieved my first full year at my new job, which is good, but I have to say I’m still unsure about my career path. I’m still looking, still listening and still hoping for a spark. Hudson turned one and Briana turned four, which may be not as significant to others but to me it meant that my little boy wasn’t a baby anymore, and my little girl is nearly school age.
Other than that life has been mostly normal. Charles is his same old good daddy and hard working self and I’m the same old content yet unsatisfied with my direction in life kind of girl. So for this I am thankful. I am thankful that things have been mostly smooth and low key. I’m thankful we are both able to support our family. I’m thankful we still have each other and our health. I have a tendency to want to shake things up when they get a little slow, but when things are smooth it just means you’ve achieved what you’ve worked hard for.
The world is big scary place. But if I have my family to come home to, it’s all okay. Here's to another year.
Friday, December 2, 2011
A Healthy Update
I don’t know about you but I have notice a significant drop in blog posts these last few weeks. I think it’s because everyone is so busy…but it made me feel more motivated to write something. I enjoy reading everyone’s posts so if you’re reading this now I really think you should take a minute to write something down. Just saying ;)
It’s kind of a boring update but I have reached my 10 lb (5%) Weight Watchers (WW) goal! Okay, the explanation point at the end of the previous sentence is kind of a fake. I would be more excited about this milestone if I didn’t feel doomed to fail the last four weeks of my WW weigh-ins. Even though I have reached my 5% weight loss milestone…I’ve only lost .2 lbs in 2 weeks. I haven’t gained weight…true…but I haven’t really lost any either. I’m just very aware of my motivation loss and trying to figure out a way to get it back.
Speaking of that….WW has come out with an additional program for people who don’t really like to track what they eat (it is kind of a pain). This new plan, Simply Filling, just reminds me how I don’t need to pay someone to tell me how to eat healthy. What I’m saying is that the new plan is nothing you or I don’t know. If you eat these foods you will lose weight and/or live a healthier lifestyle. End of story. Duh. But they kind of put it in a list for you, that way what you can and can’t eat is pretty clear. The idea is that you can eat these foods whenever you’re hungry as long as you stop when you’re full and you don’t have to count the points they are worth. Also, you can still eat the sweets and fried food you like but they don’t count as power foods and you have to track those to stay on course. I know I haven’t been incorporating enough of these power foods into my diet. So incase you care what these power foods are here is the list:
Fruits
All fresh, frozen, or canned without added sugar
•Fruit canned in its own juice (drained)
•Fruit salad — mixed fruits with no added sugar
All fruits, except dried fruits and fruit juices, are zero PointsPlus values!
Vegetables
•Most fresh, frozen or canned without added sugar or oil — whether or not it has PointsPlus values per serving
•Potatoes — white, red sweet
All vegetables have zero PointsPlus values, except potatoes, peas, corn, and avocados. Avocados are not a Power Food.
Whole grains
•Brown and wild rice
•Hot cereals, cooked — without added sugar, dried fruits, or nuts
◦100% bran
◦Cream of rice
◦Cream of wheat
◦Grits
◦Oatmeal
•Pasta, whole-wheat or other whole-grain varieties
•Popcorn, air-popped, or 94% fat-free microwave-popped
•Whole-grain, ready-to-eat cereals without added sugar, dried fruits or nuts, and with 4g of fiber or more per serving
•Whole-grains such as:
◦Barley
◦Buckwheat
◦Bulgur
◦Cornmeal (polenta)
◦Whole-wheat couscous
◦Quinoa
Non-Fat Dairy and Dairy Substitutes
•Fat-free cheeses, including fat-free cottage cheese
•Fat-free milk and beverages made with fat-free milk, such as:
•Cappuccino or latte, as long as it’s sugar-free
•Yogurt, fat-free, plain or flavored with artificial sweetener
•Fat-free sour cream
•Soy products, unflavored and plain, such as:
•Calcium-fortified soy milk
•Unflavored soy milk
•Fat-free soy cheese
•Plain soy yogurt
Lean proteins (see food list for specific cuts and grinds)
•Beef, chicken, lamb, pork, turkey, veal: lean, trimmed, all skin removed
•Dried beans, including canned black, cannellini, kidney, refried, and white
•Dried peas, including black-eyed peas and split peas
•Eggs: Whole, whites, and fat-free substitute
•Game meats, including buffalo, elk, ostrich and venison
•Lentils
•Meat substitutes, including tofu and vegetarian burgers
•Most fish and shellfish: fresh, frozen, and canned
•Organ meats from beef, lamb, pork, veal, and poultry
Breads
◦Light English muffins
◦Light hot dog and hamburger rolls
◦Reduced-calorie (light) breads (whole grains are the best choice)
Soups
◦Broth, onion, and some broth- and tomato-based vegetable soups
Desserts
◦Sugar-free gelatin
Beverages
•Coffee (without sugar)
•Tea (without sugar)
•Diet soda
•Club soda
•Seltzer (plain or flavored, unsweetened)
•Water
Seasonings and condiments
•Baking powder
•Baking soda
•Capers
•Cocktail sauce
•Extracts
•Fat-free salad dressings
•Fat-free margarine
•Fat-free mayonnaise
•Flavorings
•Herbs
•Hot sauce (pepper sauce)
•Ketchup
•Lemon juice
•Lime juice
•Mustard
•Nonstick cooking or baking spray
•Salsa (fat-free)
•Soy sauce (shoyu)
•Spices
•Steak sauce
•Sugar substitutes
•Taco sauce
•Teriyaki sauce
•Vinegar
•Worcestershire Sauce
Healthy oils
Include 2 tsp each day without counting PointsPlus values. Use your weekly PointsPlus Allowance for any additional oil.
•Olive oil
•Canola oil
•Safflower oil
•Sunflower oil
•Flaxseed oil
I think this leaves a lot of meal options without having to mess with counting all those points. Now I can have my fruit smoothies, pasta, ranch dressing on salads, and buns on my hotdogs and burgers. I don’t have to count points for eggs or multigrain toast anymore! Best of all, I don’t have to count my fat-free cheese! Sorry, I’m a little excited. I won’t make any promises but I’m going to try to stick to these food choices for the next 4 weeks in order to get as close to my goal weight as possible.
It’s kind of a boring update but I have reached my 10 lb (5%) Weight Watchers (WW) goal! Okay, the explanation point at the end of the previous sentence is kind of a fake. I would be more excited about this milestone if I didn’t feel doomed to fail the last four weeks of my WW weigh-ins. Even though I have reached my 5% weight loss milestone…I’ve only lost .2 lbs in 2 weeks. I haven’t gained weight…true…but I haven’t really lost any either. I’m just very aware of my motivation loss and trying to figure out a way to get it back.
Speaking of that….WW has come out with an additional program for people who don’t really like to track what they eat (it is kind of a pain). This new plan, Simply Filling, just reminds me how I don’t need to pay someone to tell me how to eat healthy. What I’m saying is that the new plan is nothing you or I don’t know. If you eat these foods you will lose weight and/or live a healthier lifestyle. End of story. Duh. But they kind of put it in a list for you, that way what you can and can’t eat is pretty clear. The idea is that you can eat these foods whenever you’re hungry as long as you stop when you’re full and you don’t have to count the points they are worth. Also, you can still eat the sweets and fried food you like but they don’t count as power foods and you have to track those to stay on course. I know I haven’t been incorporating enough of these power foods into my diet. So incase you care what these power foods are here is the list:
Fruits
All fresh, frozen, or canned without added sugar
•Fruit canned in its own juice (drained)
•Fruit salad — mixed fruits with no added sugar
All fruits, except dried fruits and fruit juices, are zero PointsPlus values!
Vegetables
•Most fresh, frozen or canned without added sugar or oil — whether or not it has PointsPlus values per serving
•Potatoes — white, red sweet
All vegetables have zero PointsPlus values, except potatoes, peas, corn, and avocados. Avocados are not a Power Food.
Whole grains
•Brown and wild rice
•Hot cereals, cooked — without added sugar, dried fruits, or nuts
◦100% bran
◦Cream of rice
◦Cream of wheat
◦Grits
◦Oatmeal
•Pasta, whole-wheat or other whole-grain varieties
•Popcorn, air-popped, or 94% fat-free microwave-popped
•Whole-grain, ready-to-eat cereals without added sugar, dried fruits or nuts, and with 4g of fiber or more per serving
•Whole-grains such as:
◦Barley
◦Buckwheat
◦Bulgur
◦Cornmeal (polenta)
◦Whole-wheat couscous
◦Quinoa
Non-Fat Dairy and Dairy Substitutes
•Fat-free cheeses, including fat-free cottage cheese
•Fat-free milk and beverages made with fat-free milk, such as:
•Cappuccino or latte, as long as it’s sugar-free
•Yogurt, fat-free, plain or flavored with artificial sweetener
•Fat-free sour cream
•Soy products, unflavored and plain, such as:
•Calcium-fortified soy milk
•Unflavored soy milk
•Fat-free soy cheese
•Plain soy yogurt
Lean proteins (see food list for specific cuts and grinds)
•Beef, chicken, lamb, pork, turkey, veal: lean, trimmed, all skin removed
•Dried beans, including canned black, cannellini, kidney, refried, and white
•Dried peas, including black-eyed peas and split peas
•Eggs: Whole, whites, and fat-free substitute
•Game meats, including buffalo, elk, ostrich and venison
•Lentils
•Meat substitutes, including tofu and vegetarian burgers
•Most fish and shellfish: fresh, frozen, and canned
•Organ meats from beef, lamb, pork, veal, and poultry
Breads
◦Light English muffins
◦Light hot dog and hamburger rolls
◦Reduced-calorie (light) breads (whole grains are the best choice)
Soups
◦Broth, onion, and some broth- and tomato-based vegetable soups
Desserts
◦Sugar-free gelatin
Beverages
•Coffee (without sugar)
•Tea (without sugar)
•Diet soda
•Club soda
•Seltzer (plain or flavored, unsweetened)
•Water
Seasonings and condiments
•Baking powder
•Baking soda
•Capers
•Cocktail sauce
•Extracts
•Fat-free salad dressings
•Fat-free margarine
•Fat-free mayonnaise
•Flavorings
•Herbs
•Hot sauce (pepper sauce)
•Ketchup
•Lemon juice
•Lime juice
•Mustard
•Nonstick cooking or baking spray
•Salsa (fat-free)
•Soy sauce (shoyu)
•Spices
•Steak sauce
•Sugar substitutes
•Taco sauce
•Teriyaki sauce
•Vinegar
•Worcestershire Sauce
Healthy oils
Include 2 tsp each day without counting PointsPlus values. Use your weekly PointsPlus Allowance for any additional oil.
•Olive oil
•Canola oil
•Safflower oil
•Sunflower oil
•Flaxseed oil
I think this leaves a lot of meal options without having to mess with counting all those points. Now I can have my fruit smoothies, pasta, ranch dressing on salads, and buns on my hotdogs and burgers. I don’t have to count points for eggs or multigrain toast anymore! Best of all, I don’t have to count my fat-free cheese! Sorry, I’m a little excited. I won’t make any promises but I’m going to try to stick to these food choices for the next 4 weeks in order to get as close to my goal weight as possible.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
I Am Thankful
There is so much for me to be thankful for. Let’s take a step back five years ago to November 2006. I was 19, pregnant, newly married, a sophomore in college and living in my in-laws basement with my recently laid-off husband. What I did have was faith: faith that my little family was going to be just fine.
So look at me now. My little family has grown into four. I finished college, bought a house and was lucky enough to find a decent job. I married the most responsible, trustworthy, honest and dependable man on earth. I have a daughter and I have a son. I never really thought it wouldn’t be this way. It never occurred to me that things wouldn’t work out. When it comes to family, I saw myself exactly where I am right now. I always knew my life would be a polar opposite to the life I had as a kid. When you think about it, it’s such an amazing thing. Am I really so lucky that things just worked out in my favor? Or did I make it happen all by myself, because I made the right choices and never saw myself anywhere else? Either way…I am grateful. I am grateful that Briana is my daughter, Hudson is my son and Charles is my husband. For some reason God put our souls together and I am glad for that.
So look at me now. My little family has grown into four. I finished college, bought a house and was lucky enough to find a decent job. I married the most responsible, trustworthy, honest and dependable man on earth. I have a daughter and I have a son. I never really thought it wouldn’t be this way. It never occurred to me that things wouldn’t work out. When it comes to family, I saw myself exactly where I am right now. I always knew my life would be a polar opposite to the life I had as a kid. When you think about it, it’s such an amazing thing. Am I really so lucky that things just worked out in my favor? Or did I make it happen all by myself, because I made the right choices and never saw myself anywhere else? Either way…I am grateful. I am grateful that Briana is my daughter, Hudson is my son and Charles is my husband. For some reason God put our souls together and I am glad for that.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
My Thanksgiving Plea
I am not a grouch, a scrooge and I do not say bah-humbug! But for the sake of saving a great holiday, please consider holding your Christmas cheer until November 25. I love Christmas as much as the next Elf and I love Christmas music, and shopping, and putting up the tree. But something weird is happening. No one is excited about Thanksgiving.
This year might even be the start of the extinction of Black Friday. Suddenly, people can’t wait until the day after Thanksgiving to do holiday shopping; they want to do it the night of. I love shopping to, and I love getting great deals…but there is one thing wrong with this: more and more retail workers of the America have to miss a family holiday because they have to stand behind the cash register to check out your gifts. I think then, you are just as much to blame as the company who made them work. So it is my plea with you to not go shopping on Thursday…not even at 10pm. Enjoy the rest of fall. Enjoy your family. Cook, drink, be merry, but most of all…stay home! You have an entire month to shop, put up lights and sing Christmas carols. Stand up for those workers, and stand up for Thanksgiving. It should be appreciated for what it actually is, and not because it’s almost Christmas.
This year might even be the start of the extinction of Black Friday. Suddenly, people can’t wait until the day after Thanksgiving to do holiday shopping; they want to do it the night of. I love shopping to, and I love getting great deals…but there is one thing wrong with this: more and more retail workers of the America have to miss a family holiday because they have to stand behind the cash register to check out your gifts. I think then, you are just as much to blame as the company who made them work. So it is my plea with you to not go shopping on Thursday…not even at 10pm. Enjoy the rest of fall. Enjoy your family. Cook, drink, be merry, but most of all…stay home! You have an entire month to shop, put up lights and sing Christmas carols. Stand up for those workers, and stand up for Thanksgiving. It should be appreciated for what it actually is, and not because it’s almost Christmas.
Give Thanks and Let Go
Quick Update on WW Wednesdays...
Okay, when I wrote my last WW Wednesday’s blog post, I was a little nuts. 3.4 lbs in one week? Ha! I was just angry at myself for gaining. But it is the only time it has happened, and I shouldn’t go crazy on myself. Anyway…I weighed in today and I have reached my 5 % goal. I’m only .2 lbs away from my 10 lb sticker (I’ve actually lost 15ish but started WW after I started losing). So that is the update on my weight.
More…
Now, on to more important things. In the spirit of Thanksgiving I think we should all think of the things and people we have to be thankful for and let go of all the things or situations we wish we had. There is a truth to life, and it is this: There are things in life you can change, and there are things you can not. If it is something you can accomplish, then accomplish it. It’s going to be hard and it’s not going to happen over night, but it can be done. So stop saying, “I want a better job,” get off your lazy butt and start looking for one. Then, keep looking until you find it. But stop torturing yourself with the dream of it all. Turn your dreams into motivation, and make a commitment to yourself.
There are also the things, people and situations in your life that you can not change. Stop wishing you had better parents or siblings. Stop waiting on a million dollars to fall in your lap. If these things happen, then great! But don’t rely on it and don’t build your life around it. Especially when it comes to people, I now believe it’s important to purge ourselves of negative energy. No matter how much you love someone or wish they were a certain way…they’re just not and they probably won’t ever be. Consider letting go of these people...even if it’s slowly. You’re not going to miss them; you’re only going to be sad for what you wish they could have been, or the relationship you want. Everything in life revolves around energy. Letting go of that bad energy makes room for good energy. If you’re receiving a lot of negative energy in your life, you have to consider the quality of the energy you’re putting out. Karma is real.
I let go of my father a couple of years ago. It was hard. I thought what about Christmas, birthdays, and
“I Love Grandpa” mugs? I want to experience those things. I want my kids to have a grandpa, and I want to have a dad. But even if I kept in contact with him, it wouldn’t be all the love and fuzziness I so deeply desire. I can’t miss those things, because I never had them. And my kids wouldn’t have it either. Keeping him in my life was a daily reminder of the pain he’s caused me all my life. So even though I feel the same desire, keeping him doesn’t make that desire come true. At least by letting him go, time slowly heals the hurt and my wounds aren’t ripped open every time I talk to him.
So I say, don’t keep these people in your life. For Thanksgiving sake…truly be thankful for what and who you have and let go of what will never be. Push yourself to open up new opportunities and let go of old hurt. I can say…it gets better. There is a reason for everything in life. You're reading this blog for a reason.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Okay, when I wrote my last WW Wednesday’s blog post, I was a little nuts. 3.4 lbs in one week? Ha! I was just angry at myself for gaining. But it is the only time it has happened, and I shouldn’t go crazy on myself. Anyway…I weighed in today and I have reached my 5 % goal. I’m only .2 lbs away from my 10 lb sticker (I’ve actually lost 15ish but started WW after I started losing). So that is the update on my weight.
More…
Now, on to more important things. In the spirit of Thanksgiving I think we should all think of the things and people we have to be thankful for and let go of all the things or situations we wish we had. There is a truth to life, and it is this: There are things in life you can change, and there are things you can not. If it is something you can accomplish, then accomplish it. It’s going to be hard and it’s not going to happen over night, but it can be done. So stop saying, “I want a better job,” get off your lazy butt and start looking for one. Then, keep looking until you find it. But stop torturing yourself with the dream of it all. Turn your dreams into motivation, and make a commitment to yourself.
There are also the things, people and situations in your life that you can not change. Stop wishing you had better parents or siblings. Stop waiting on a million dollars to fall in your lap. If these things happen, then great! But don’t rely on it and don’t build your life around it. Especially when it comes to people, I now believe it’s important to purge ourselves of negative energy. No matter how much you love someone or wish they were a certain way…they’re just not and they probably won’t ever be. Consider letting go of these people...even if it’s slowly. You’re not going to miss them; you’re only going to be sad for what you wish they could have been, or the relationship you want. Everything in life revolves around energy. Letting go of that bad energy makes room for good energy. If you’re receiving a lot of negative energy in your life, you have to consider the quality of the energy you’re putting out. Karma is real.
I let go of my father a couple of years ago. It was hard. I thought what about Christmas, birthdays, and
“I Love Grandpa” mugs? I want to experience those things. I want my kids to have a grandpa, and I want to have a dad. But even if I kept in contact with him, it wouldn’t be all the love and fuzziness I so deeply desire. I can’t miss those things, because I never had them. And my kids wouldn’t have it either. Keeping him in my life was a daily reminder of the pain he’s caused me all my life. So even though I feel the same desire, keeping him doesn’t make that desire come true. At least by letting him go, time slowly heals the hurt and my wounds aren’t ripped open every time I talk to him.
So I say, don’t keep these people in your life. For Thanksgiving sake…truly be thankful for what and who you have and let go of what will never be. Push yourself to open up new opportunities and let go of old hurt. I can say…it gets better. There is a reason for everything in life. You're reading this blog for a reason.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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