It Is Easier to Do Nothing

Today I read a little blog post  titled Focus (http://pingandpal.blogspot.com) by my great friend Katy...and it has inspired me to write this blog post.

She shared three questions that we should use to help guide us in life:

1.  What is the most important thing to you in your personal life?
2.  What is the most important thing to you in your current job or future career?
3.  What is the change you want to see in the world? Honestly, what do you want to leave behind?

I think these are so on target. I too, am facing some decisions and change in my life right now and often have panic attacks at the thought of change...good or bad. I don't want to disappoint people and I don't want to make the wrong decisions. I need to realize that it's inevitable and I should do what's best for me and my family regardless of those fears. It's not even time to make any decisions and I'm already sweating.

Sometimes I feel like a flake for my need to constantly search for a more meaningful road in life. Why can't I be happy with what I do? Why can't I accept things the way they are? I am blessed. Why push it? Then comes the guilt. On the other hand, I get angry at other people who don't have the balls to make any life decisions at all. It is easier to do nothing then to do something great. So that's what most people do...nothing. I've been guilty of it too. All I know is that I went to college to accomplish a dream. I went to college to be unlike my family. I want to enjoy all hours of my day and have a direct impact on someone or something that needs my help. It sounds selfish almost...saying I me my me want want want. And part of it is selfish...I want to be happy. But the other part of me wants to contribute to the important issues of the world...or atleast of Missouri... so I can know it's a little better with me here. It's sounds trite...but I believe in a greater good and I think it's not right for any of us to leave this world without contributing to a greater good. 

The lesson I need to learn here is to slow down and make decisions slowly and thoughtfully. I'm the person who writes blogs too fast, gives presents too soon, and judges too quickly. I'm good at listening to other people but maybe not so good at listening and being patient with what's right in front of me. I want to reach out and grab things so quickly but often misjudge their distance.

So this is me...slowing down...taking a breath. It's a terrible thing in life when you avoid the questions around you. Say yes or say no, but remember to say something when you're ready. The questions won't go away unless you address them.

Not Guilty?

I am the first person to get annoyed at the people who have be the first ones to post the latest pop culture breaking news. I have several friends on Facebook who had their fingers waiting to be the first person to comment on the Casey Anthony verdict. Well today I was sort of one of those people. I wasn't waiting to update my status but I was waiting and wanting to know the verdict the second it was read. I have been following the Casey Anthony case since I first heard the 911 call on TV three years ago and it touched my heart because Caylee was nearly the same age as Briana.

Well our constitution has spoken, the jury has spoken, and Casey Anthony was given her fair trial. The verdict: Not guilty on all charges except false information. I am disappointed and sad for Caylee as many many are. I wish she could be here still and still have a voice. I won't say much because it's over now, but the bottom line is that Caylee was missing 31 entire days before Casey told anyone. That's the only fact I need to know to know she's guilty.

I respect our justice system and think the jury didn't have enough information and/or the state should have tried for 2nd degree instead of 1st. And now, Casey is free to walk the streets of Florida. I accept the possibility that I don't know the entire story because I didn't live it. I also accept that my opinion doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. I am not perfect and someday I will be judged. I know God loves us all and the only comfort I have through death is knowing the victim isn't suffering anymore. But we are suffering through her. Caylee's grandma and grandpa are suffering. I believe there is a special place after death for people who hurt children and may the person who did this, find that special place.

I'm sad today for Caylee, and for all the other babies who will never have a voice.