5 Years Together

In a little over a month, Charles and I will have been married for 5 years. We have been together for over 7. In all honesty…relationships are hard. Marriage is even harder. I’d be a liar if I told you I never doubted our relationship. I’d be a liar if I told you I have never been so angry with him that I thought about leaving a time or two. But in those times of doubt, in those times of hurt and anger, I always found peace because I knew the answers to the following questions:

1.) Does he love me? Oh yes…oh yes he does. I’ve never once believed that there was even a possibility that he didn’t or that he is less in love with me today than he was when we first met. Men are less emotional than woman. They are usually more practical and straightforward. It’s a hard lesson for woman to learn, but even if he doesn’t say it or show it at times…it doesn’t mean it isn’t so. They need a little push. They need to learn to communicate in a more open way, much in the way we women need to learn to stop being so overly dramatic about life. If you are around each other long enough, you will rub off on each other and things eventually even out. We teach them…and they teach us. But I think it’s mostly the first.

2.) Would he ever be unfaithful, or hurt me in any way? Not in a million years. Not in bajillion, or zillion years. I have such a faith in my husband in this way. You might think that other women have felt this way… and then BOOM! They find an old girlfriends number in his pants pocket, or he got angry one night and shoved her. You might think that they never saw it coming…that they had the same faith in their own husband. But I think you are wrong. I think she never truly had that kind of faith at all. There are always little hints, little signs of person’s true intentions. And if you love a man, you know. A woman’s intuition doesn’t lie. Trust your instincts, and it will save you a lot of heartache. If he does it once, he will do it twice…and then a third time. Don’t be a victim. My husband is faithful in everything he is and everything he does and I believe with everything I am that I can always depend on that. I wouldn’t expect anything less, and I wouldn’t accept anything less.

3.) Is he a good father? The best. First of all, he is here. He is a good husband who respects his wife and is at home with his children. So many fathers today are not. As much as we love each other…the children are first. He works for them. He wants them to have a nice home, a good school district, a place to grow up free and happy. He wants a good education for them, he wants them to have more choices than we did. He wants them to feel loved and safe. He wants everything that I want for them and he’s doing the work to make it happen. Like he always says, “There are two kinds of people in this world, Do-ers, and Don’t Do-ers.” To say the least, he is a Do-er. People are right to say that actions are stronger than words, which is why I forgive him for not having many.

I am a 24 year old woman and I am so thankful for all that I have been able to accomplish with him so far. I met Charles when I was 17, when I wasn’t mature, when I didn’t know what I wanted or who I was. I can’t believe how lucky I am that he turned out to be a great life mate, a great husband, a great father. I’m thankful that we are able to laugh together. I am thankful that we are able to argue and then forgive. He is the only man I have ever been able to depend on, and the only person who I’m comfortable enough with to be my 100%, uncensored, imperfect, messy, emotional self.  I will always be his.

Flood Flood Go Away

Flooding is always very strange to me. I can't quite grasp how so much water leaks out of the river and floods surrounding areas for miles and miles. I don't think we have reached the flood of 93 levels yet, but I believe we are headed in that direction. Flooding has never affected me directly. Right now I live on a big hill in north Platte City, and in the past I've always been too far in town.

Right now, at this very minute, my poor hardworking husband is outside in the heat dumping rock underneath the railroad tracks in order to raise them in Atchison (who is experiencing severe flooding) so that the trains can still pass. He has to walk uphill on the rock in order to dump it for miles and miles so his ankles are really sore from walking sideways on an unstable surface for hours. Sunday he worked a 17 hour day and he's worked late every night this week. Every night he comes home late, puts Icy-Hot on his ankles, helps with baths and then goes to sleep.

I'm angry at the railroad for being less prepared and for working their employees to the bone, but I am so thankful that I have a husband who goes out every day to do that kind of work and provide for his family. He really is the best example of hard work that I've ever seen. My hero.

Father's Day

This is a late father’s day blog… but what they hey, you’re used to waiting for me. If you know me you know that I can not say happy Father’s day to my own father. Quite honestly he’s taught me what a man not ought to be. I do, however, love him and miss the good parts of him but every Fathers Day since we stopped communicating I hold my head a little lower and wish I could have been a real daddy’s girl. But…if anything… I think he did a little better job at raising my sister and I then his parents did and I’m going to do a lot better then they did.

On a happy note there is a man in my life who is a responsible, loving, fun-having dad. His name is Charles and he’s wonderful.  Briana will always be daddy’s little girl and Hudson will always have a strong male figure to look up to. He teaches them by example to be tough and wise, how to respect yourself , and how to respect women. If my kids turn out to be anything like their dad they will be clean, on time, baseball playing, hard working machines. Of course they will also be smart, creative, and patient like their mother. J

Parenting is the hardest job in the world. I can’t imagine doing it without him.